A day when we look at each other, look at all the kids, *don't look at the bank*, and feel surprised or something. Do you ever have those days when you're like...holy crap. We're parents, and there are a lot of them. Because sometimes, you don't feel any different than the 19yr olds you used to be. But there you have it. Proof. Highlights to cover up the sneaky jerk gray hairs that popped up and made me cry. His beard that has some, but OF COURSE he looks sexy, rugged, and just more sexy on top of that. Feeling like we just got married, but that we've been together for a million years - in that good way. It's weird. Anniversaries, birthdays, holidays...they're so awesome, but really weird like that too. Then throw some kids on top - and though you might not feel any different and like that much time has gone by, you have proof. Because all of a sudden, they're 12, almost 11, almost 9, almost 7, and 2.
The Plan: Mr SWAT home by 2, kids at my parents by 2:30, we have from 3:00 to 9:00 to do whatever we want! See a movie, go to dinner, maybe hit up Target. This is basically what we do. But it's us. We have fun - you know, once you get over that weird hump of, "there are NO KIDS IN THE CAR to interrupt us, and now we can't think what to say to each other". It happens.
Simple anniversary plans, right?
Mr SWAT gets to work, finds out he is actually the boss for the day. It's fine, we can roll with this, he's still leaving early. I'm excited because i gave the kids the day off, so i have all morning to get pretty, find a not stupid outfit, paint my nails, and just not look like a lump of crap. #5 disagrees with all this. Crying. Hanging on my leg. Kids are fighting. Not the usual stuff, seriously going above and beyond to tick each other off. In my heart, we were going to go to Target, i was going to get a new outfit for our date. I think you know that did not happen. I got out nail polish. 3 little girls appeared from nowhere at the smell of it, and needed manicures and pedicures. 30min later, i'm doing my nails. #5 poops promptly. Text from husband, it's not going as planned, he can't leave yet. You know inside, i'm already just feeling THAT feeling. The sinking, REALLY? we can't even pull off getting to Applebees?, sad, of course this is happening feeling. The "why do we even bother" feeling. All i can think about is all the hoops we have to jump through just to go out for a few hours. Making sure kids are dressed, fed, diaper bag packed, blaa-blaa. And it's even worse if someone comes here to watch the kids, because then i have to clean and feel i must bake a dessert or something.
People keep asking what big plans we have for 14. I feel a little embarrassed to say we're going to Applebees, a movie, and hopefully Target.
Look up movies. Guess what. NO good movies. Well, i'm sure they are good movies, but, as usual, no comedies. It's literally all man-movies. And you know i don't mind a man-movie, but we have this thing where we always see either depressing movies or EVERYTHING IS BLOWING UP movies on our anniversary. And the times are all stupid. WHY are movie times always so stupid? WHO PLANS THIS CRAP? At this point it's 3:00 - with crankly toddler and fighting kids, i'm also still in pajamas. And i'm kissing a date night kid free Target trip goodbye.
In my heart i know we are seeing this movie that i don't actually want to see. This Al Pacino and Christopher Walken one. HUGE dramatic sigh.
Also, at this point in the day i have whined to everyone i know, sent miserable texts, and i'm annoying the crap out of the universe over my messed up day. I shouldn't be allowed to use any form of technology when i'm upset or angry.
Husband finally rolls in (because of course the gas light came on in his work car, which also reminded me that we are on E in the family car, add that to the list of awesome) at 4:00. I'm finally dressed, but i tried everything on, took pictures where all i can see is how awful i look, i'm upset over my hair not doing what i want it to do, the fact that i got "complements" on it that actually sounded like "hey congrats on looking old!", and just ohmyword. I'm that lady. Where you are like, "SHUT OFF". I could have found the downside of someone showing up with free groceries for the month.
So, he walks in with a dozen roses and *my favorite* a dozen tulips, and a beautiful card. LOVE.
Drop kids off - we didn't even get out of the car. Literally gave the kids the boot, and peaced outta there.
Movie theater. THAT movie. Stand Up Guys, i think. We got nachos, a hot dog, popcorn, and approximately 2 gallons of soda. We were the only people in the theater, on a Wednesday, at a 5:30 showing. Until 15 min into the movie, when 2 other couples show up. Now, for the record, it was a good movie. Really odd, but funny. Christopher Walken cracks me up. He could say anything and it makes me laugh. Then we have this weird thing going, where we are the only ones laughing at funny things. Then the other couples laugh at things that totally aren't funny. This happens alot, and i chose to think it's because we have an awesome sense of humor. We're both sick from eating theater food. I keep thinking my Mom or oldest daughter are going to text or call. Movie done, head to Applebees. We should have asked for a certain place to sit, but didn't...they put us basically on top of another couple. It was weird. We felt like we should talk to them. We didn't. We're laughing. Have dinner, reminisce, talk about the kids, realize we can't eat dessert. I do hate that, i always feel cheated when i don't get dessert. Next time. Pick up kids, hang out with my Mom, realize my brother and Dad weren't there most of the time and feel terrible, then we go home.
Back to normal. The nightly struggle of making people go to bed. Getting his work lunch ready for the next day.
So it was weird. It didn't go like i wanted it to. But we laughed alot. And when i calmed down and relaxed, it was awesome. I always just want things to be EASY, but nothing is...I need to stop thinking anything will go like we plan and just enjoy the moment. But as i've said before, i suck at that. All this to say, 18 years of knowing each other, 14 married, it's kind of amazing. And loving someone more now than you ever thought you could? The best.